Monday, June 30, 2008

something odd in the spacing

you know what you have to do, don't you?
you know it, but you're just sitting there.

s    t   r  e  t  c h .    .   .  . .
and breathe it out.

there.
now, you can.

it's just a hard hat

thank You for great things. thank You, thank You. 
for rushing waters, and thundrous noise.
for heat like fire, and canopy shade.
for sunrise, and sunrise, and sunrise, and sunrise.
and the occasional sunset.
and mountains, thank You, thank You, for mountains.
mounting on the beaches, even.

thank You.

i take it for granted, even when i'm not taking it for granted.

but thank You, anyway.
millions and millions of beautiful.
and i twirl in the middle of it.

i set up shop in the sand,
in the middle of it,
waiting for golf bolls.
like, can't you see i'm relaxing here?

Sunday, June 29, 2008

dancing with life

hello, bandit.
when did we become friends?
when did i fremember not to be scared?

hello, bandit.
care to dance?

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

what the fuck, knees?

my body looks and feels foreign to me.
but i know i've been here all along.

i'm just getting used to it.

buzzing all around you

you know what it's like when you don't let anything bother you?
well... nothing bothers you.
it's like that.

of course it is.

you're nodding like oh it's so simple.

Friday, June 20, 2008

music inside phones

remembering how to be alone, among people. remember when you weren't sure how to be among people?

remembering how to be alone among people. remember when you always were?

remember how to be alone. 

and yet, everywhere, now, is a solid place. music everywhere.

Friday, June 13, 2008

waking up every day.

who am i?
and what have you done with me?
and where are you taking the others?

Monday, June 9, 2008

telling you how it is

i'm getting stronger than ever. and everything we do, i cannot take for granted. it is impossible. i love these people. and how they cooperate. and dance easily among each other, picking up after like they'd been doing it all their lives, and nothing, really, to any of it. and how easily i dance among them? like precious harmonies. i'm getting stronger than ever before in many things that i do.

even though i still get mad at sand.

the inside of this card looks like an elephant

every little bit of this is made of so much care. every little bit you take for granted.

or maybe you don't... good for everybody. whatever. awesome.

but it feels really good to be part of what cares.

and i'm pretty sure at least somebody notices. and i do it for them. and that's what's for myself. that every little bit of me that cares.

it'll fill you up: just that little slice of heaven.

i made this with love. and some construction paper. and some vegetables. and some very very dear friends.

you're right, though. i totally do this for myself.
good for everybody. whatever. awesome.
i'm trying not to get too deep into this. it's how to get farther in.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

me vs. the sand

i got mad at sand today. yup, sand.
how's that for an ego throwdown?
bunker down.

Saturday, June 7, 2008

what a crazy night

i am flooded
flooded with memory
or rather memories of emotions
hitting me from all angles
all sides

feeling strange in my bones
in my childhood places
myself transplaced
walking around an old home
and secret staircases
elephants and salt n pepper shakers

this is the night you were sent here for

Friday, June 6, 2008

shrugging off the mess in my head

there is no war in your head, it's a jam battle. just enjoy the music. these intellectual pursuits don't get you any closer to God, any closer to Love.

sometimes i hear my head and i burst out laughing. 'you are getting nowhere' and then i remember: you have nowhere to get. you are already here. and you have superhuman strength. divine, even. i don't make any claims on it, i just live it and love it. or at least, i keep trying to.

thank Goodness.

You Are.

Love. Love.

i love you

or at least i'm trying.

so not this intellectual pursuit

sometimes, i find myself meditating with my nose so far in the air, i get a crick in my neck. this love gets all self righteous. this spiritual ego is not progress, it's just renewing itself. and i'm spewing myself all over everyone, mocking humble from way up there above you, like that's some better place to be. and wondering how i got so lonely. and wondering how you got so astray. never realizing i'm the one who's lost. sucked into this void. fucked for avoiding the wonder that you are. teacher, teacher, everywhere. 

stop talking.
action loud.

what beautiful flowers

the only thing i have to complain about is complaining.

sure, seeing the negative in everything is a talent, but it's just not a talent i appreciate.

"what beautiful flowers... but you sure will have to do a lot of watering."

Sunday, June 1, 2008

you're going to a wedding!

if you act like you belong, no one will question your presence. they might even give you flowers. anyway, you belong everywhere once you stop questioning everything.

even if everyone else is questioning you. but then, they never really showed up in the first place, did they? and you are always here.

wearing sunglasses births the opportunity to remove them. and make eye contact, rather than stumbling upon it. 

like, hey. i showed up. are you here?

friendly is just so easy to gauge

everywhere i go, gifts.
strangers, even.
like we've always known each other,
and we're just excited to see each other
again.

like bringing a bottle of wine to dinner.

but certainly not hogging it all.